1,364 Pearls: Connect (Verb): To give. To Understand. To never take back.


1,364 pearls. Of Wisdom. Stemming from 1,364 days spent in this place that quickly became my home : Assumption College. We never dwell in the beginning on how we will change from point A to point B as we turn write the first capital letter to a new chapter in our lives. But this mini series will be a declaration of the lessons I have learned throughout my four years as a college student, away from the textbooks and power point presentations. A dedication to stunning individuals. A memoir to becoming unique. A love story with a place, people and precious pearls of wisdom. A love tale that took 1,364 days to write but would take a thousand more lifetimes to ever forget the moral of the story.

When the number 7 was broken on your cell phone and you needed to call Cingular but their help line conveniently contains about five number 7s in it. So you asked to borrow his phone.

During an interview. When you clearly were not supposed to speak about the candidates’ progress but you had to tell her how good she had done while washing your hands next to her in the bathroom.

A completely random coincidence. He had purchased this giant cupcake that you could not keep your eyes off of so you gathered up the courage and asked if you could have some. Bold, yes. But that cupcake was delicious.

It’s crazy how life unravels like a story book. A person enters into your life and the first encounter you never expect that a hundred pages in the future might include their name. It could be the tiniest gesture. A smile. A hug. An email. Some Random Fishing Line Of Communication. Thrown Out Into The World. And A Connection Bites Back.

In a world that is supposedly so “connected” it is crazy how disconnected we really can be. I could sit and look at my 1,500 or so Facebook friends and revel in my popularity. But why would I do that? At the end of the day, a handful of them are actually going to stand up for me when it counts. We feel like we need to forge these connections with so many individuals. We need to put ourselves out there in the world so that everyone can love us. Right?

I have not blogged in a few days. And honestly, I was not really thinking about it because I was focusing on the connections that I have with individuals who mean the world to me, ones that have been there for me, ones that in eight weeks or so will sit alongside me at graduation. Will cheer from the audience. Will wave goodbye to me as I open up a window to a new life.

I came into college thinking that I had to be so “connected” to everyone. To know everyone, to have them know me. But truth be told, what have I learned from this crazy desire? That if you spread yourself thin, if you give everyone a big chunk of your heart, you will find yourself wondering who to go to when you have given the whole thing away…

It is good that I can wave and smile at a number of people within the course of a day. It is a great blessing. But the people who know me, who really know me, well, those people are few and far between. And I would like to keep it that way.

To be connected, really and truly connected on a level where words no longer suffice, is to be vulnerable. It’s putting yourself out there. It is giving up a part of yourself, knowing that you will never get it back. Knowing That You Never Want It Back. And can we do that with everyone? Can we give all of our Twitter followers the key to our heart? And if we do, how soon after will we need to call up someone to change the locks?

The people who “get” us, the ones who understand us, they have a special gift that we would not want the whole world to have. Not only do they understand us, they help us understand our place the world. They push us from “start” to a place we never anticipated as “finish.” They hold our dreams when we feel too weak in faith to cradle them ourselves. They make the word “connection” too good for a dictionary. Too sweet for a thesaurus. Too vivacious for a translation.

But we first must be willing. As I said before. We give a part of us away. And as we learned in the second grade: No Take Backs.

But when we meet people who are worth it, oh well, we all know it, I am sure of it. And often we never see it coming. It makes life exciting to think that one day you could see a total stranger and the next day you could be thanking them for changing your life. It adds a certain element to this crazy and chaotic swirl of events. Where everything can be tumbling or falling or breaking and broken.  Where things can be up but then down and somehow sideways. Where you can know everything  one day and nothing the next. Yes, it adds a certain element. And I daresay it’s worth it.

Leanna is one of the people who knows me. Not only does she know my heart, more importantly, she knows how my heart beats. This past summer, when she needed to hear it, I sent her a quote from Eat, Pray, Love. She returned the favor a week and a half ago when I needed the advice the most.

“Dont you see what happened? This guy touched a place in your heart deeper that you thought you were capable of reaching, I mean you got zapped, kiddo. But that love you felt, thats just the beginning. You just got a taste of love. That’s just limited little rinky-dink mortal love. Wait till you see how much more deeply you can love than that. Heck–you have the capacity to someday love the whole world. It’s your destiny. Don’t laugh.” –Richard from Texas, Eat, Pray, Love.

I carried Richard’s advice, given to me by Leanna, with me all day. The next day, Richard Vogt passed away suddenly from a heart attack. I don’t know the way in which life works. But I do know the words that he left me with and that they must have come to me again when God wanted them to. And I pray he rests in peace.

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22 thoughts on “1,364 Pearls: Connect (Verb): To give. To Understand. To never take back.

  1. You’re so right – one of the things I’ve learned through blogging, actually, is that no matter how many hundreds of “friends” I may have on Facebook, a small handful of them are going to be there for me when it counts, and actually care to be physically present in my life when I need someone. I have a sparse handful of those real life people, and I’m finding it’s growing a little larger including the friendships I’m making through blogging, and one day miss Hannah Katy I hope our paths shall cross 🙂

    1. I hope the same Emily. I am continually amazed by the friendship we have formed through blogging and I thank God for all the amazing advice and support you have given me.

      And I am checking your vlog later, but no sound on this computer! Cant wait.

      Best,

      Hannah Katy

  2. Is it starting to sound like a broken record, the way I 101% (110 is too cliched, haha) agree with everything you write? I love the connections in life, the knowledge that you are in the thoughts of someone else and vice versa. You know what though, I even relish the most short term connections, you know when you meet someone travelling for example, and you know the couple of days you spend with them will most likely never be repeated. But for that sparkling moment you are all connected in the same moment and the sharing and laughter therein is just… magical.

    p.s. Nice legs! 😀

    1. Oh, I totally agree. Isn’t it crazy how someone can enter into our life and teach us something amazing and then in an instant they are gone. It is like they were never there but your heart tells you otherwise. Ah, I love it. And I never get tired of hearing from you Stephen K. Thanks for the sweet compliment as well, ha ha, a switch from a red dress to red heels was in order.

      Best,

      Hannah Katy

  3. Oh Hannah –

    Thank you for your words! It makes my heart smile to know that my words could have the same effect on you as your words have on me. Your words have real emotions in them, and I always read them in awe 🙂

    Thanks again,
    Carolina

    1. Always a pleasure Carolina. I am a big fan of your blog, especially because you are so real. Thank you for the compliment as well. Have a great Patty’s Day.

      Best,

      Hannah Katy

  4. You always leave me speechless with your words. You have a beautiful ability to get really deep in a way that seems to flow easily from your fingertips. Anyway, you are right–I treasure my true connections–the people who know me best in this world. I trust those people–entirely–with the care of my heart, and I would definitely not want to do that with everybody…it would be too scary!! And I am always welcome to adding more people to this list, but I am also careful who I let all the way in. It’s always funny to look back and see how non-chalantly all of my deep friendships began…how even the smallest event ended up turning my life around. ❤

    1. Thank you Lisa. Your comment just added so much to my day and I always adore hearing from you.

      After I wrote the post last night I could not fall asleep because I kept thinking about how I met my best friends and people who have changed my life. I would have never seen it coming. It blows my mind.

      Best,

      Hannah Katy

  5. “The people who “get” us, the ones who understand us, they have a special gift that we would not want the whole world to have.”

    Favorite line. So true about our friendship. I loved this blog post and it was just what I need to read today. Thank you!

    Sending lots of love from Prague!!

    1. Words cannot sum up the ways in which I miss you lately st. end. But remember the poem in our journal? That is what I am thinking of lately… e.e. cummings, good stuff.

      Sending love from Charlie’s..

      Best,

      Your Be Fri

    1. Hi Christy:

      I don’t run as much as I used to but I do love getting runs in, especially when the weather is gorgeous. I am a big gym fan though ha so that is where my epic mixes come into play. Thanks for stopping by.

      Best,

      Hannah Katy

  6. Hey Hannah,
    Thanks for visiting my blog and commenting! I hope you stop by again sometime! I liked reading through some of your posts. You seem like such a well-rounded gal! I love reading about you and your friends. You’re lucky to have that!

    Shelley

  7. OMG, this post was amazing…. I felt like I could relate to each and every part of it, and it definitely touched me 🙂

    As amazing as it is to make connections and know as many people as possible, at the end of the day, only very few will be there for you at any moment and love you unconditionally for who you are.

    Thank you for this great post!!!

    xo

    1. Thank you Kinsey, I am glad you liked it. It is a subject that has been on my mind a lot lately so I am glad I got the chance to articulate it and that it struck ya. Have a great day.

      Best,

      Hannah Katy

  8. This is such a beautiful post and it’s something that we all need to remind ourselves of. It doesn’t matter how many friends we have – it’s a matter of having quality friends who have the ability to be there for you no matter what. It’s about taking in every single moment of your life and cherishing it.

    Thanks for this!!

  9. I have about 3 or 4 girlfriends who I consider VERY close to me. Who, even if I don’t see them for months, I know that it would be like we were never apart the next time we can meet up. Friends I’ve had for years! One, over 15 years! I love my friends so much and don’t know what I’d do without them. Including my very special blogging friends 🙂

  10. Hi There! I ran into your site absolutely by mistake, and it turned out to being a blessing. You bring a lot of interesting things to the table and I will be back for more 🙂 Thanks!

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